My New Theroy

So my new way to get over him is to forget about the memories and remember new ones as friends. If it goes a different way then cool, if not well were just friends. I'm ready to find someone new. So, I think I'm going to go to my church group thing on Sunday nights. I know that's bad to go to a church to meet new guys but, I think if it helps heal my heart then I think God will understand.

I also need to go back to my 'lifestyle change' before I start putting even more pounds back on. This summer I know I'll be strict again.

Today I looked at all the people prom pictures on Facebook. I'm excited for my prom next year. I hope Nessa and Adam stay together, so we can go to prom together. :) That would be so much fun. :) Here are some of the dresses I've been looking at today. Only the unique ones. When I go to prom they won't be anything like these. Mine will be cheaper. :)

Now I remember how I lost my weight. I didn't eat. This dawned on my a few days ago. My reasoning had been to improve my image in hope he would take me back. But yesterday after that phone call in the kitchen, I knew it was May 30, 2009 the day my daddy didnt come home, that had truely changed me. Now every moment on has changed me as well.

It's been a rough two days.

~nat

I Hate It

Okay so my new years resolution was to be nicer. I've failed. I've been the biggest bitch ever that last week. I feel pretty bad because I snapped at anything. I decided today that I've just been made at myself and that's why I'm taking my anger out on other people. I've been slipping back to my old ways, with being mean and the bigger thing, eating.

I upset over my weight and it is bugging me all the time. I have to get back to my no pop, and work outs on my own. I need to get back my drive, my mojo. I've been seeing my self loose it more and more. I need to stop, take a step back and start going again on the right path. I believe in myself and I have my support.

My blogger be my witness I want to work towards being at the most 150 by June. I used to make millions of goal to myself and such but I really need to work at this for me. I need to be positive again and believe in myself to do anything I want to do.

Psssp! Don't tell don't want to jinx it but I started talking to someone again and yeah :)

~Nat

Being Active

So... I got on Wii Fit last night for the first time in 358 days, I know impressive. Not really but what is impressive is that I have lost 22.7 pounds. I was shocked. I knew I had lost some but not that much I am now 166. It's so awesome. My family and other people keep telling me that I look better. 

Since we are out of P.E. I want to stay active, because lets face it I have a lot more to lose. So every night I have been doing 20 crunches and 20 full sit-ups, and if i feel like it 10 push-ups. I have been trying to do some type of jogging or running everyday. Saturday I chased after Adam, so that counts a little. But yesterday I ran for 10 minutes on 6 mph. Yeah doesn't sound much but you do it then we'll talk. Today Nessa and I tried out jogging... lets just say thats something that I will have to do alone for a little while then walk with her later. It felt so good to jog like that it's probably called running but I'm calling it jogging.  

The neighbors are a little older then us one is probably only a couple years but I think one is like 4 years older. I don't know we just keep casually taking that way for our walks to check them out while they're playing hockey, we call it our heterosexual route... Jake won't walk with us anymore. 

I texted with Mike last night he's nice. I don't know, were like half flirting half just talking. I don't right now I just talk to him for someone to talk too. We talked for like four hours last night. I asked Billy today what Jena thought about the other night, he said she had fun and that Mike had fun too. I was like yeah I've been texting with him. Billy's all like and??? I'm like and what? He's wanting to know what we talk about, normally if I could tell him verbally I would tell Billy all about it, but I just told him that Mike was asking when I was having people over again. Then Billy went on about if Joe had been there, then told me he had to go take a shower. 

We have to go get sponsors tomorrow with our other cousin Sara who lives up here. She's going to be on the Wanigan too this year, so is Zach. Me and Nessa don't really like Sara but we're ganna try hard and have a a fresh start with her this year. We have to dress all up for it. Oh well it's worth it.

Another emotionless post, but I don't feel like putting effort in to it so get over it.

I am making it a goal not to say 'lol' on blogger.